Tuesday, February 10, 2009

Cupid makeover

Alrighty, I haven't done a real blog in forever, 'cause I've been really grouchy, and gimpy, and I just didn't feel like it! Today is Wordless Wednesday, but see, I'm gonna post this anyway .. and I'm gonna pre-date it for yesterday, so I can still pretend I've been wordless on Wednesday and post a picture, 'cause that's just how I roll, homies.

In all my klutzy glory, I managed to twist the ligaments in my knee about a week and a half ago. I had to be on crutches because for some reason, Pookie didn't want me using her as a crutch anymore .. something about her head being smushed down into her shoulders and no longer having a neck or something, I didn't hear her very well, she was a little muffled.

Let's talk about Valentine's Day.

I've been seeing all the commercials for buying diamonds on Valentine's day to show her you love her. Buy this, buy that. Watch this lovey dovey movie that's coming on for this lovey dovey day. By the way, if you don't have someone to be all lovey dovey with on lovey dovey Valentine's Day, you're a loser.

What if I don't want to be with anyone on this stupid day? What if I want to wander into a floral shop and just start chucking bouquets at people for only being in love on Valentine's Day? Why should there be ONE day a year where everyone is lovey dovey? Why shouldn't it be EVERY day of the year? This is the stupidest holiday ever. Plus, it's catered mostly to women. Watch the commercials, who are they telling you to buy for? HER. Buy HER diamonds, buy HER this and that and the other thing. I'm a woman and it still makes me sick.

I hate it. Hate this holiday with the white hot passion of a thousand burning suns. (I'm totally stealing that line from Nyxie, because I can, and because it's the closest to explaining my feelings about this day).

I think that cupid needs a makeover. He should be wearing a little black wings and have little black roses in his hair. I'm gonna toss the bow and give him tiny poison spears, so he can fly up to people who only show lovey feelings on Valentine's day, and jab them in the eyes with them. Yep, that's how it should be.

So, this Valentine's Day, I'll be home, alone, as usual, trying desperately to find a horror flick, maybe My Bloody Valentine, to watch on TV while chatting on the phone with Nyxie or Paula or Brian, and giggling at the picture in my head of cupid stabbing people in the eye with a spear. Oh hey, maybe they could come up with a horror flick about it. I'd totally watch it. Yay Valentine's Day! :)


Paula aka. Zani said...

*chokes on her coffee* Damn... I know better than to take a drink while I am reading your blog.. and then I went and did it anyway. lmao

Yeah.. when we were talking about this on the phone it was just the germ of an evil idea.. and it has grown... nurtured by the anti-Valentine love/hate that is in your heart. I love it, Sis. lol


Nyxmyst said...

Yep.. we can drink together and then torture random people. Works for me.

I still say you need a weekly accident report on your blog, though. You're almost incapable of getting through a week without doing damage to yourself and we all want to laugh about.. err.. sympathize with you.

Yeah, that's it.

Nyxmyst said...

Six days, eh? So that means I should expect to hear you falling over a piece of furniture when we're on the phone tonight?

Good to know. :P

Tempestuous said...

*ponders* .. so .. I -shouldn't- share my chocolates with you?


Alice said...

By the way I missed you...good to see you back!!!! xoxoxo

Crazy Charm said...

Valentine's Day can suck it!

Shannon said...

My hubs and I aren't big on V-Day, either. Just another day...

I'll be lucky to get a card from him, LOL!

aequitas said...

Going a week without hurting yourself may be a challenge but just know we are rooting for you... good luck and break a leg :)

kidding of course ;)