Dear Pookie,
Do you remember when the alarm went off at 6:45 this morning and you came lurching into my bedroom to say good morning, or rather, what sounded like, "gahmorninmomugh?" Do you also remember that when you came in, I gave you your morning hug, told you I loved you, and reminded you that if you were going home with Mouth after school that you needed to get your clothes together?
No?
Well, maybe you remember 20 minutes later when you were wandering aimlessly through the house, yapping to Mouth, who was also wandering aimlessly, both of you still half dressed, hair all jacked up because it hadn't even seen a brush yet, and I reminded you again that you were, in fact, supposed to be getting ready for school and that you needed to get your clothes together if you wanted to go home with her after school today.
No? Still not ringing any bells?
How about at 7:40 this morning, when I said in dulcimer tones, "GET YOUR BEHIND OFF THE BED, GET DRESSED, BRUSH YOUR TEETH, BRUSH YOUR HAIR AND IF YOU'RE GOING HOME WITH MOUTH AFTER SCHOOL, GET YOUR CLOTHES TOGETHER!!!" ??
Ahh, you remember that one?
Then why, my darling daughter, why is it that 10 minutes later, when there were a mere 3 minutes left before the bus came and I came to remind you that shoes would be a good idea in 40 degree weather, it being winter and all, and asked where your bag was to take to Mouth's house, you said, "Oh, I forgot to get my clothes together." You do realize you are driving your mother to drink, right?
By the way, Pookie, I love you more than life itself. You are the center of my universe, my miracle baby, my everything, but did you really think you were going to get away with that display this morning? Did you really think that just because you had company I would not go all ninja on your little behind when you threw your little tantrum? Do you really think I care that Mouth was watching? Surprise!
Yes, I love you, but you will NOT act like that without repercussions. I. Dare. You. to ever stomp through the house and start throwing stuff again to show me you're unhappy when I say something like, "I've reminded you 3 times to get your clothes. If you don't have them ready, you are not going because I am not bringing them to you after school."
Consider that a challenge if you like, my lovely. I will always win. Know why? Because I'm the alpha in this family and you still have much to learn, little grasshopper.
All my love,
Mama-San
Thursday, February 26, 2009
Dear Pookie
Posted by Divine Chaos at 2/26/2009 08:04:00 AM
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4 comments:
Yep yep yep... even more convinced than EVAH.. I am so glad I only have a boy.
Though I must admit there are plenty of opportunities to remind my lovely handsome darling son on a regular basis that the only reason he is still breathing is by my good graces, and because the best drugs the pharmacy can fork out somehow manage to keep me from ripping his head off and beating him with a stick with a nail in it. Especially now that he is taller than I am. *sighs sighs sighs*
Is it too late for the beer and cigarette diet to stunt their growth? Think anyone would notice if we muzzled them?
Love you. *smooches*
P.S. Pookie.. glad you are still breathing. Love you too. *smooches*
Suffice to say, there were periods of my morning today where I thought I was dreaming because I kept having the same arguement with my oldest son, over and over again, in a 5 minute period. I sent him out the door with the loving remarks, "No matter how old you get, I will always be smarter, I will always know what you're trying to pull, and I will never let you get away with it. I love you. Have a good day at school."
Sigh...
That's right, pookie cakes. It's good to be queen!
*change into a box like wall-e and stay trembling that way till next post*
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