Tuesday, October 13, 2009

My line of thought is squiggly ...

I'm not sure where I'm going to end up with this post, but I'm going to start with this kitten that my Pookie wanted to keep out of our litter. Her name is actually Sukai, but I call her Susie Snot-a-Lot. I'm not sure exactly what is going on in her little cat brain, but she stalks me through the house so that she can sneeze on me. Seriously. I can hear her snuffling and meowing from the next room. When she finds me, she climbs my leg ...doesn't matter if I'm standing or sitting, she climbs my leg ... sneezes and blows kitty snot all over me, jumps down and goes to find her sister, M.K. (short for Mary Katherine Gallagher), or Pookie. Pookie, of course, thinks it's hilarious and starts giggling when she hears me say, "Hi there Sukai, did ya need to sneeze again?"

She is a cat of many names. Sukai, Susie Snot-a-Lot, the Gray-White Hunter

Her specialty is catching chairs, but she's not half bad at catching my arm and then gnawing on it like a corn on the cob.

This has been a horrible year for spiders. I don't know where they keep coming from. I've killed more spiders in this house in the last month than I've seen in here in the last 4 years . I've gone through a bazillion and a half cans of hairspray killing those little buggers. I've hairsprayed them, painted them and had scarespiders hanging all over the place to no avail. They just keep coming. On my adventures in shopping, I found this little gem

Do you see that? It KILLS ON CONTACT. That is a little white lie. It does kill them, but it fails to mention that before they die they will go crazy, stand on their head, and then RUN DIRECTLY AT YOU, which may possibly make you shriek like a girl while dancing backwards across the kitchen, clocking yourself in the back of the head with the open cabinet door and climb on top of the counter that holds the scalding hot toaster oven where you just toasted your English muffins, where you might stay until the spider goes into its final death throes and finally curls up and dies.
I'm not saying that WILL happen, just that it COULD.
There must be a nest of these little freaks behind my sink and dishwasher, 'cause that's where they keep showing up. Big, black, hairy, 8-legged freaks. They stare at me, daring me to make a move.
I think they can smell fear.
I need a spider killin' super hero


CJ said...

You need to have a talk with your cats...mine kill all our spiders!!

Harlem's A Hatin said...

The kitty is so adorable!!!

Captain Dumbass said...

You obviously have a hidden artistic talent. And I would never make fun of you possibly squealing like a little girl at spiders. Not that I ever would, of course.

*looks around nervously*

Irish Gumbo said...

I'd be your spider-killin' superhero...'cept sometimes they make me scream like a girl.

But only sometimes :)

(Thank you for your kind comment on the Teapot!)

Divine Chaos said...

CJ: I've tried to have that talk with my cats, but they seem to have ADHD 'cause halfway through the conversation, they're climbing my leg, or chasing a stray packing peanut.

Harlem: Isn't she just? Now if I could just get her to go after spiders with such gusto.

Captain: I try to hide my artistic talents, I don't want anyone to be jealous of my masterpieces :-) I don't care of ya make fun of me squealing .. as long as ya get me some ice for the knot on the back of my head.

Irish: Darlin, I don't care if you scream like a girl, as long as you kill the spiders for me. I'll go get you that cape ... ;)

Anonymous said...

I hizzate spiders! (Knock on wood), I've only seen maybe 2 of them in our house ever, thank God!

Paula said...

Hey! Look at it this way Sis..

Cheap Halloween Decorations!!! Yay!!!

You need more white paint though to really do it up right.. and then you will be on the right track. =Þ

This is me.. bein all hellfull again.. yahno? =D

Love you!


Crazy Charm said...

OK. Don't laugh, but your cat might have allergies. Seriously. My parents dog has allergies and sneezes all the time. They can be allergic to dust, pollen, etc. just like us. I've read they're also sensitive to chemicals in cleaning supplies and the like.

Tempestuous said...

Hot Shot works like a DREAM!!!!! I love that shite - got like twelve cans of it around the house in strategic locations. Supposedly if you spray it around fixtures under sinks and stuff it'll help kill anything that tries to sneak through for a while - I haven't tried that, cuz mine come from the damned recessed lighting in the ceilings waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay over my head. *sighs* I totally commiserate with you on how thoroughly evil and horrible and rotten and wrong it is for arachnids to ever venture iside the house Sis. *gives you lovin snugs of sympathy!* Make pookie kill the evils (just have her put on a respirator mask first so she doesn't accidentally inhale the spray *nods!*). ;)

Paige Lacey said...

Too funny. Love the cat. Love the image of you crouched on the counter. Things are never dull around your place, are they!